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Writer's pictureHadiya Samuel

How do you survive the bad days of parenting?

Updated: Jul 13, 2021

You know exactly what I'm talking about. The days when you feel like the absolute worst version of yourself. When despite all of your usual self pep talks and affirmations, you just want to crawl into your bed and be left alone. It may be one persistent thought, or it may be a perfect storm of small things building to a Category 4 hurricane. Regardless, you know that you do not have the option to call in sick. Mamas don't get sick days. So how do you do it? How do you push through? I'll share what works for me.


Put it in perspective

On the days when the doom parade is marching down the streets in my mind, I remind myself that I can change the scene. Perspective is everything! I make a metal list of the causes for the way I feel, And I sort out which ones are within my power to change. Often times I realize that with a little clarity of mind, I can change my perspective on most of the sources of my negative feelings. Do my feelings just stop marching on? Not at all, but I don't buy into it. I keep replying to the negative thought with my positive affirmations. Easier said than done, but with practice it gets easier.

Tips:

  1. Fill in the blanks: I feel ______, but the truth is______.

  2. Remind yourself to focus on the things you can change.

Change your environment

Often when having a bad day, the first instinct is to isolate yourself. This is a mistake. Now is the time when you need your tribe the most! Your personal Mama tribe can help you change your perspective by being your sounding board. If you just don't want to talk about it, that is ok too. Sometimes just a casual conversation with jokes and regular chit chat gives the break from the blues you need to turn the day around.


Tips:

  1. Change your scene by going for a drive or talking a walk outside.

  2. Take a break from your to-do list (your a mom- I know you have a long list) and spend 30 minutes doing something you enjoy.

Put down the cape

Some days your mental tiredness may more than usual. So take off your super mom cape for the day. Try this: review your to do list for that day. What can be postponed to another day? What can you delegate out? Cut your to do list down to the items that must be done and focus on accomplishing only those tasks. Your blues may be your mind's way of letting you know that you need rest. Reducing your load for that day may be the ticket to improving your mood.


Tips:

  1. Remind yourself that self care is important to stay healthy.

  2. Allow yourself to rest when you need it.


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